Author: Rauf Aliev

The only thing missing is the birch trees

Descending into the subway with Liza:

— Liza, I don’t remember, do we live on the gray or orange line?

— Well, dad, we used to live at the penultimate station of the gray line in Bibirevo, and here too we live at the penultimate station of the gray line.

We wasted four bucks. The line is closed, replacement buses are waiting for us outside.

I’m lost. Where am I?

An alley in Washington. Today is the open house day at European embassies. We’re in line for “Ireland”. The queue — 300 people. Half remain

Music of the Day

Stumbled upon a wonderful dialogue between two intellectuals on my favorite dirty https://experov.d3.ru/aleksandr-poniatov-i-pervyi-v-mire-videomagnitofon-1368194/#20587149, dubintek and Lastchance13, about the usefulness of biologists in Russia. There are about 20 screens of conversation, but it’s quite readable in fragments)

https://experov.d3.ru/aleksandr-poniatov-i-pervyi-v-mire-videomagnitofon-1368194/#20587149

I have the game Wordrive for iOS, Android, and Bada. I’m tired of paying Apple a subscription, and it’s no longer available in the app stores. Does anyone want to take over? I’ll give it away for free, with source code and rights, if there are serious intentions. Alternatively, I’m just looking for someone with an account to publish it again online. It’s perfectly playable. On the website – we did it.

http://wordrive.com

http://wordrive.com/

A blonde walks into a casino and places her bet on roulette — all on 22. She wins. Puts everything on 22 again.

The croupier:

— Madam, it’d be better to bet on a different number: the same number doesn’t come up two times in a row.

— No, I have my own system.

She wins again! Places all the money on 22 once more.

The croupier:

— Madam, while the same number might come up twice in a row sometimes, I’ve never seen it happen three times in my life. Better put it on a different number.

— No, I have my own system. Bets on 22.

She wins again! Collects a heap of money and heads to the exit. Someone catches up with her and says:

— Excuse me, I am the owner of the casino. You’ve won a large sum of money. We’ve checked – everything was fair, but we will give you the same amount again if you reveal the secret of your system.

— Alright! You see, I flew here by plane. Flight number 7, seat number 7. I arrive at the hotel – they give me room number 7. Do you understand?

— Yes, but you bet three times not on 7, but on 22.

— Well, three times seven — that’s 22!!!

Here you probably didn’t know that BASS is pronounced “base,” not “bass.” Unless it’s a perch, of course.

Echo of Moscow remains unchanged: for about ten years they have been making their program announcements amateurishly with simplistic, flat humor based on wordplay that is supposed to appear witty but in reality is just childish. Despite this, they have a very good team of hosts and very appropriate programs. Why they don’t make an effort to create better announcements and audio jingles is beyond me.

For example, “We do not differentiate by gender, age, or reason. None of this matters… We will publish all your letters and suggestions on the website and announce them on the air.” How can one not differentiate between concepts from different categories? Age and gender?

Of course, among them, there are some excellent ones. “Listen to the radio, the rest is just an illusion.”