WOW, it turns out that under the shell near the anus of sea turtles, the parasitic crabs Planes minutus make themselves at home, and there’s only enough space for a cozy duo, so they form a monogamous pair and live happily ever after inside the turtle’s butt (had no idea what to do with this information, so I brought it here). In relation to the turtle, this is commensalism. It’s when it’s good for one (or in our case, two), and the third doesn’t give a damn. I see a scientific paper claiming that they sometimes mistake the turtle for ocean debris, where there’s room for more than one wife, and then, goodbye monogamy. But, at least, no butts involved.

