Tag: Humor

Unexpected Perks: A Tale of Four Kettles and a Smart Ring | May 22 2026, 19:21

I ordered a Breville kettle. Costs a hundred bucks. Yes, I could have bought a similar one for 30, but I have all Breville products, plus a kettle is bought for several years. I come home – there’s a box up to my waist at the door. Not that surprised, because Amazon likes to put some little thing in the far corner of a huge box, it’s easier for them. But doubts increased after I couldn’t lift it with one hand. I bring it inside — and there are four kettles.

I open Amazon, check the order – everything’s correct, just one. Maybe they sell a 4-pack for 100 bucks? No, the description says one kettle. I contact support, a robot responds. I select the “brought extra items” option. The robot says “our fault, keep them”. Well, okay, now I have four kettles. Big family, one kettle for each.

Nadia has an Oura Ring 4. She says it has to be charged often. She says it used to last longer. I get in touch with support. A robot responds. I activate my own robot and ask it to draft a good letter to support. Their robot empathizes, says, “I’ll now connect to your ring and understand everything.” Connected, understood. Says, expect a new ring. Today, a plain envelope arrived with the ring inside. If it weren’t for FedEx it’d be easily lost in spam.

I love robots, almost got seven hundred bucks worth of goodies because of them. Well, good, at least the ring was a warranty case, although I expected to be dismissed with my battery complaints.

Well then, I asked the robot to make an illustration for the post.

Navigating Without GPS: Understanding Cardinal Directions in Moscow | March 13 2026, 18:41

The spokesperson for the Phystech press service explains how to determine cardinal directions in Moscow when navigation systems are down. Find the North Star or use the sun: it rises in the east and sets in the west. Also reminds us how to determine directions using trees. Ziya, do you know how to find cardinal directions using trees? — What’s there to know? Fir tree points north, palm tree points south!

Overall, it seems the Phystech press service is not aware that in Moscow, the annual amplitude of sunrise point movement is almost 90 degrees. That means, it only sometimes (like now, in March) actually coincides with the east. But they do know the word “asterism”. I think most readers will place it somewhere near the word “flatulence”

CIS Headquarters’ Outdated Member List: A Curious Oversight | March 07 2026, 03:22

It’s funny, at the CIS headquarters in Minsk 1) they still think that the CIS is alive (joke) 2) they still think that Ukraine is still there (never was part of the CIS, but officially left the CIS governing bodies in 2018). By the way, Moldova started the withdrawal process this year.

Exploring English: Verbs, Misunderstandings, and Learning Through Contrast | March 06 2026, 23:57

About the English language. When Yuki sees another dog, he adorably places his chin on the ground and presses his paws to his face, but I have to tell him every time not to approach because once he lets them get closer, he suddenly starts growling and instigating a fight. And what verb would you choose for that?

Well, from school I knew that roar meant growl. And I even told everyone “roar” for the first week until I googled it and realized that in roar, it’s tigers, lions, and motorcycles, but for dogs, it’s growl or even snarl (with teeth showing).

Or take the phrase “cook food.” To cook comes to mind, but actually, to cook implies thermal processing (fire, stove). If you’re “cooking” a salad, tea, or a sandwich, a native speaker would say make. Saying “I’m cooking salad” is like you decided to boil it.

Or suppose you decided to watch a movie. In English, the choice of verb depends on where you are and how large the screen is. When you go to the cinema, you use the verb see. “Let’s go see the new Dune movie at the cinema.” If you say “I watched a movie at the cinema,” they’ll understand, but it sounds a bit technical, as if you were sitting there closely studying the screen like a security guard monitoring it.

But. When you turn on your television, laptop, or projector in your living room, watch comes into play. The verb watch implies extended attention to something on a smaller (relative to theater) screen. By the way, if the screen is off, you look at it (as an item). Once you turn it on and a picture appears, you start to watch it.

Generally, for an advanced level, it makes sense to attach each concept to a scale, to remember the words in shades of intensity. For example,

Cry -> Weep -> Sob.

Annoyed -> Irritated -> Angry -> Furious -> Livid.

Smile -> Chuckle -> Laugh -> Giggle -> Guffaw

Spitting -> Drizzling -> Raining -> Pouring

and so on.

And then further distinguish them by paired opposites, like the smile-cry from the example above.

It’s very easy to remember when put together.

But it’s necessary to try to apply them, otherwise it’s no good. Some words may be bookish, and here it’s important in what context it is said. If you told a friend in a pub: “I cannot comprehend this beer” – it would sound as if you’re writing a dissertation on that beer